As an Indian living in Sweden, a lot here resonates very strongly. And I loved the way you've written this piece. I shared it with close friends and have it saved as a reminder to self for all those kinda days. Here's something I wrote that maybe you might like to read: https://buttondown.com/StreetHaunting/archive/delhis-smog-exceptionalism/
Interesting article. As a European who lived in China for years and years, it resonates.
I often notice that Western Europeans, and Westerners in general, can come across as carefree, innocent, and “simple” (emotionally, at least) to the Chinese. After living in China so long, I know where this impression is coming from. Still, it must be said that people from Western cultures would not recognise themselves in this description. In the end, it's just a Chinese perspective. In turn, the Chinese can also seem somewhat "innocent and simple" (although maybe not carefree) to Westerners, at least to ones who only stay in China for a short time.
I don't know if there's some objective way to measure this stuff. Perhaps there isn't. Antidepressants are more used in Europe than China, per capita, but that may just be due to the under-developed state of mental health services in much of China. Suicide rates are, surprisingly, higher in most European countries than in China, and higher in Denmark than in China too, at least from the statistics available. This doesn't really point to people having such carefree, emotionally balanced existences. The truth is that Europeans are, in my view, full of neuroses and issues of their own.
I certainly see the point about people in Denmark not "clawing" like they do in China, though. In China it can feel like people are always on their guard in some way, and even good personal relationships have a way of turning sour without you being able to pinpoint exactly what went wrong. Personal relations in Europe are not always easy, and clashes certainly occur, but people usually don’t start off assuming things will go wrong and others are out to get them.
Most Chinese tend to explain it all by there being too many people in China and not enough resources. This is obviously a big part of the reason, especially compared to a country like Denmark. On the other hand, I’ve now spent time in at least one place that’s significantly more densely populated and poorer than anywhere in China, in other words the island of Java, in Indonesia. It’s the world’s most densely populated island, with 160 million people. There are plenty of problems and poverty, but people’s general attitude towards others certainly seems to be more relaxed and less suspicious than in China. Local people in Java also seem more self-accepting and less neurotic than both Chinese and Europeans.
Perhaps the difference is to do with the lack of religious faith in China? The legacy of the Cultural Revolution? A culture that encourages people to be competitive and seek success, coupled with a lack of resources and overcrowding? All of the above? There are so many factors that I find it hard to say.
Thank you for this thoughtful response—and you're right, it is just one perspective.
Your point about antidepressants and suicide rates is interesting. My theory—and it's only a theory—is that many Chinese people, having spent so long in survival mode, have developed a higher threshold for difficulty. When you're used to navigating real uncertainty and risk, you build a kind of resilience, but also a kind of numbness. Things that might feel catastrophic to someone here are just... Tuesday. You endure. You move on.
Meanwhile, in places where the basic structures of life are secure, smaller problems can loom larger—not because people are weak, but because they haven't had to develop that particular callus. And perhaps the absence of real struggle creates its own kind of crisis: a boredom, a lack of meaning, that can be just as hard to bear.
Neither is better. They're just different ways of being shaped by circumstance. The Chinese person who can't understand why a Dane is depressed, and the Dane who can't understand why a Chinese person won't slow down—they're both seeing clearly, and both missing something.
As for Java—I don't know enough to say, but your observation about religion is interesting!
You're right, the average person in China has had a harder life than the average person in Denmark, or even elsewhere in Western Europe. It's even more true for the older generations. It must also be said that the suicide rate in China has decreased a lot in recent years. A few decades ago it was a lot higher (again, if we believe the statistics).
Talking about different perspectives, I would also note that most Italians wouldn't envy the Danes, even though Italy is poorer and much less well run than Denmark. To Italians, Italy’s far better cuisine and climate make up for any advantages Scandinavia may have. In Italian eyes, the behaviour of people in Denmark and the rest of Northern Europe can also come across as cold and unfriendly, and that’s another reason why most Italians don't particularly wish they were Danes.
As an Indian living in Sweden, a lot here resonates very strongly. And I loved the way you've written this piece. I shared it with close friends and have it saved as a reminder to self for all those kinda days. Here's something I wrote that maybe you might like to read: https://buttondown.com/StreetHaunting/archive/delhis-smog-exceptionalism/
Thank you for the kind words. Hope you also found ways to make here home. 😊
Interesting article. As a European who lived in China for years and years, it resonates.
I often notice that Western Europeans, and Westerners in general, can come across as carefree, innocent, and “simple” (emotionally, at least) to the Chinese. After living in China so long, I know where this impression is coming from. Still, it must be said that people from Western cultures would not recognise themselves in this description. In the end, it's just a Chinese perspective. In turn, the Chinese can also seem somewhat "innocent and simple" (although maybe not carefree) to Westerners, at least to ones who only stay in China for a short time.
I don't know if there's some objective way to measure this stuff. Perhaps there isn't. Antidepressants are more used in Europe than China, per capita, but that may just be due to the under-developed state of mental health services in much of China. Suicide rates are, surprisingly, higher in most European countries than in China, and higher in Denmark than in China too, at least from the statistics available. This doesn't really point to people having such carefree, emotionally balanced existences. The truth is that Europeans are, in my view, full of neuroses and issues of their own.
I certainly see the point about people in Denmark not "clawing" like they do in China, though. In China it can feel like people are always on their guard in some way, and even good personal relationships have a way of turning sour without you being able to pinpoint exactly what went wrong. Personal relations in Europe are not always easy, and clashes certainly occur, but people usually don’t start off assuming things will go wrong and others are out to get them.
Most Chinese tend to explain it all by there being too many people in China and not enough resources. This is obviously a big part of the reason, especially compared to a country like Denmark. On the other hand, I’ve now spent time in at least one place that’s significantly more densely populated and poorer than anywhere in China, in other words the island of Java, in Indonesia. It’s the world’s most densely populated island, with 160 million people. There are plenty of problems and poverty, but people’s general attitude towards others certainly seems to be more relaxed and less suspicious than in China. Local people in Java also seem more self-accepting and less neurotic than both Chinese and Europeans.
Perhaps the difference is to do with the lack of religious faith in China? The legacy of the Cultural Revolution? A culture that encourages people to be competitive and seek success, coupled with a lack of resources and overcrowding? All of the above? There are so many factors that I find it hard to say.
Thank you for this thoughtful response—and you're right, it is just one perspective.
Your point about antidepressants and suicide rates is interesting. My theory—and it's only a theory—is that many Chinese people, having spent so long in survival mode, have developed a higher threshold for difficulty. When you're used to navigating real uncertainty and risk, you build a kind of resilience, but also a kind of numbness. Things that might feel catastrophic to someone here are just... Tuesday. You endure. You move on.
Meanwhile, in places where the basic structures of life are secure, smaller problems can loom larger—not because people are weak, but because they haven't had to develop that particular callus. And perhaps the absence of real struggle creates its own kind of crisis: a boredom, a lack of meaning, that can be just as hard to bear.
Neither is better. They're just different ways of being shaped by circumstance. The Chinese person who can't understand why a Dane is depressed, and the Dane who can't understand why a Chinese person won't slow down—they're both seeing clearly, and both missing something.
As for Java—I don't know enough to say, but your observation about religion is interesting!
You're right, the average person in China has had a harder life than the average person in Denmark, or even elsewhere in Western Europe. It's even more true for the older generations. It must also be said that the suicide rate in China has decreased a lot in recent years. A few decades ago it was a lot higher (again, if we believe the statistics).
Talking about different perspectives, I would also note that most Italians wouldn't envy the Danes, even though Italy is poorer and much less well run than Denmark. To Italians, Italy’s far better cuisine and climate make up for any advantages Scandinavia may have. In Italian eyes, the behaviour of people in Denmark and the rest of Northern Europe can also come across as cold and unfriendly, and that’s another reason why most Italians don't particularly wish they were Danes.